Exciting post about EYEBROWS!

So I am a girl with eyebrows. Strong, proud eyebrows that my dad used to refer to as “ferrets”, the kind of eyebrows one does not miss. I didn’t pluck them for years because my mother banned such things on account of once having her eyebrows plucked and they NEVER GREW BACK which is insane, I cannot imagine this, for mine have a life of their own (sometimes I imagine that they are demanding to be FED) and I cannot imagine eyebrows being well-behaved. I have come to like my eyebrows. They are quite useful.  Arching an eyebrow is an invaluable skill when you are as deadpan and sarcastic as I am.  Obviously I jest.  I am a source of contentment and joy for all!

Firstly, a couple of my heroes. (EYES TO THE RIGHT check out Kate’s arched brow, she is excellent at this)

So, the majority of girls pluck their eyebrows. I know this. Everyone knows this. The women on this list have very well-groomed eyebrows but they are also unafraid of sporting some brilliantly unapologetic browage which I totally appreciate.

Kate Winslet, for one, has gone from skinny eyebrow to heavy eyebrow and has settled somewhere between to excellent effect.  When she was in Titanic I was well impressed by her excellent brow topiary but moreso by her hair colour, which is something I am still striving for.

Brow Excellence Achieved.

Brooke Shields! Who could leave Brooke Shields off this list?! She is like the American Eyebrow Goddess. Even now I admit to having a major girlcrush on the youthful Brooke, even to the point where I used to try to copy all sorts of aspects about her look and style to poor effect given that I was a sturdy lass and she was far more waif-like. I tried to copy her for years, but alas – her innocent pre-Raphaelite classic beauty escaped me. Her eyebrows though! Such a bold facet of 80s cool! So fresh and honest and unmessed with! And yet so tidy and elegant. Truly, brows worth modelling one’s look after. Brooke, I wish I could be you.

Going strong.

Later excellent personages like Alexis Bledel have something close to her strong-eyebrow’d innocent look but I don’t think anyone managed it like the mighty Brooke of the 80s. Classic Brooke was quite something.

Also I love this outfit, I wish it was my outfit.

Emma Watson’s eyebrows are far more groomed but I can’t overlook her – she photographs so very well. She also acts with her eyebrows more than anyone, which isn’t the best thing in the world, but she is much improved from how she was as a little ‘un (as are we all).  She’s included through sheer eyebrow mileage – hers are well-deployed. You rock ’em, Watson!

Brow At Large

Nicholas Hoult and Skandar Keynes both rock the ‘brows. No, this isn’t a women-only list, I appreciate a good male brow too. Even moreso, in fact! It lends a solidity to a face. Hoult has plenty of this, but Keynes is a little more pretty (a lot of pretty right here, ain’t gonna lie) but both are examples of pleasing shapes. Hoult’s are less groomed. Which is nice. Very nice. (I have lost Skandar’s photo somewhere. These things are sent to try us. I am uncowed! I blog on.)

There should probably be a sexual health warning on this one.

Zachary “Sylar Spock” Quinto’s eyebrows need not be questioned for they are more valid than most internet arguments. Look at these brows: they are POWERBROWS™. He could level cities with one arched brow! No wonder he was cast as Spock, these eyebrows are a work of art and genius and he rocked it as Spock, it absolutely cannot be denied. These are also versatile eyebrows, being both dark, stormy and villainous (Heroes!) as well as very interesting and thoroughly heroic (Star Trek!). He is a very attractive bloke, really. Before someone says “omg he’s gay” I am not expecting to bear his children, so that’s absolutely fine (Matt Smith however (I FORGOT MATT SMITH) would not be fine, for we would have huge leggy children). I appreciate his eyebrows and I believe his eyebrows do a lot of good for the world like all the other excellent brows on this list and beyond. His stubble too, yes. Totally does sterling humanitarian work, that stubble.

And lest we forget, the Spock Brow is just legendary in and of itself.

OH NO GUYS I FORGOT ABOUT CHRIS PINE'S EYEBROWS.

And then we have the luminous and insanely excellent Eva Green.

She's brilliant. We share a name, you know. We're like TWINS.

To leave her out would be unforgivable. There are a thousand things to love about Eva Green (her name’s damned cool, she’s easily one of the best actresses of our generation, she is unafraid to Helena Bonham Carter it up a red carpet, she can speak LANGUAGES!) and her eyebrows are effectively the tip of the iceberg – but she uses them perfectly. Watch anything with her in. Wait for the sultry seductive look. It’s a killer!

COME HITHER OR WHAT.

See? See?!I know, I know. The lady is just too awesome for words. She could probably seduce a wall. She may have been sodding around on Camelot of late but I am holding out hope that she’ll end up on Game of Thrones doing that awesome scene-chewing scene-stealing vamped-up thing that she does. Is it acting? It’s more than acting. She is a sorceress of the silver screen. And yes, look, her eyebrows are smokin’. And yes we share a name. It is an excellent name.

Cary Grant. His eyebrows need no introduction because he is KING. Everything about this man is something worth emulating.

Pure class.

Audrey Hepburn. Of course. Are you kidding?! Like I could leave THIS brilliant lady of brilliance off such a list! You must be mad.

Audrey.

You can totally suggest other Eyebrow Icons.

LIKE JENNIFER CONNELLY. DAMNIT. Another teen icon of mine. DAMNIT!